Frustration

Damn my emotions,
Damn my confusion.
I really do wish,
I had a solution.

I don't understand,
I'm starting to cry.
This hurts me more,
Than I can describe.

I hate this feeling,
This feeling of pain.
My heart hurts more,
Than it can attain.

I want an answer,
But it's not there.
I'm making you wait,
And that's not fair.

I know you're upset,
But you're not to blame.
It's all my fault,
I deserve the shame.

I know how you feel,
I'm doing you wrong.
And I'm making this worse,
By waiting so long.

I'm so upset,
I feel I could die.
But all I can do,
Is sit here and cry.

I'm lucky to have,
A person like you.
Who cares so much,
Whose love is true.

But if I don't choose,
You'll leave me behind.
I can't take forever,
To make up my mind.

Some time to myself,
Is a needed provision.
To assess my emotions,
And make a decision.

If I didn't want you,
If I didn't care.
I wouldn't be so upset,
And in such dispair.

So next time you ask me,
I won't hesitate.
I'll give you the answer,
You won't have to wait.

My frustration is gone,
And hence, the confusion.
You've waited so long,
But I've found my solution.

~Nicky 15, Enfield, CT