CHORUS:
Hi! My name is (what?)...my name is (who?)...
my name is... Slim Shady
Hi! My name is (huh?)...my name is (what?)...
my name is... Slim Shady (2x)
Ahem...excuse me!
Can I have the attention of the class for one second...
Hi kids! Do you like violence? (yeah yeah yeah!)
Wanna see me stick nine inch nails through each one of my eyelids? (uh huh!)
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (yeah yeah!)
Try acid and get fucked up worse that my life is? (huh?)
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin' to get my head straight
But I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate (Ummmm..)
Dr. Dre said: "Slim Shady you a basehead..."
Uh-uhhh! "Then why's ya face red, man you wasted..."
Well since age 12 I've felt like I'm someone else
Cuz I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt
Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off
And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross
I smoke a fat pound of hash and fall on my ass
Faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast
C'mere slut! (Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog!)
I don't give a fuck, God sent me to piss the world off
CHORUS
My English teacher wanted to have sex in junior high
The only problem was my English teacher was a guy
I smacked him in his face with an eraser
Chased him with a stapler
And stapled his nuts to a stack of paper (Owwwwwwww!)
Walked in a strip club, had my jacket zipped up
Flashed the bartender and stuck my dick in the tip cup (Wsssshhhhh...)
Extraterrestrial, killin' pedestrians
Rapin' lesbains while they screamin': "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!"
99% of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mom does more dope than I do
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
Make a record about doin' drugs and name it after her (Oh thank you!)
You know you blew up when the women rush the stands
To try to touch your hands like the screamin' Usher fans (Aaahhhhhh!)
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph
So I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, ASSHOLE'
CHORUS
Stop the tape! This kid needs to be locked away! (Get him!)
Dr. Dre don't just stand there, OPERATE!
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive
Am I comin' or goin'? I can barely decide,
I just drank a fifth of vodka...dare me to drive? (Go 'head.)
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years, my palms are too hairy to hide
Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk
I spit when I talk, I'll fuck anything that walks (C'mere.)
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
HOW YOU GONNA BREAST FEED ME MOM? YOU AIN'T GOT NO TITS!
I lay awake and slap myself in the bed
Put a bulleproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (BANG!)
I'm steamin' mad (Arrrggghhh!)
And by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah.)
Tell him I slit his throat in this dream I had . . .
* this is the EDITED song version
words that were blanked w/o being replaced are in {}'s
Chorus: repeat 2X
Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. Slim Shady
Ahem.. excuse me! Can I have the attention of the class for one second?
Hi kids! Do you like Primus? (Yeah yeah!)
Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids? (Uh-huh!)
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did?
Try {'cid} and get messed up worse that my life is?
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin to get my head straight
but I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to {impregnate}
And Dr. Dre said, "Slim Shady you a basehead!"
Uh-uhhh! "So why's your face red? Man you wasted!"
Well since age twelve, I've felt like a caged elf
who stayed to himself, in one space, chasin his tail (blalblalblabla)
Got ticked off and ripped Pamela Lee's lips off
Kissed em and said, "I ain't know silicone was 'sposed to be this soft"
I'm bout to pass out and crash, and fall in the grass
faster than a fat man who sat down too fast
C'mere lady! (Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog!)
I don't give a damn, Dre sent me to tick the world off!
Chorus
My English teacher wanted to flunk me in junior high (Damn!)
Thanks a lot.. next semester, I'll be thirty-five
I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler
and told him to change the grade on the paper (Now!)
Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up
Served the bartender, then walked out with a tip cup
Extraterrestrial, runnin over pedestrians
in a spaceship while they're screamin at me: "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!"
Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mom does more {dope} than I do
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
Make a record about doin {drugs} and name it after her (Here mom!)
You know you blew up when the women rush your stands
and try to touch your hands like some screamin Usher fans (Aaahhhhhh!)
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph (Dude, can I get your autograph?)
So I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, {ASSHOLE!}'
Chorus
Stop the tape! This kid needs to be locked away! (Get him!)
Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, OPERATE!
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive
Am I comin or goin? I can barely decide
I just drank a fifth of Kool-Aid -- dare me to drive? (Go ahead)
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years, and my palms are too hairy to hide
Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk (hachhh-too)
I spit when I talk, I'll {fuck} anything that walks (C'mere)
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
HOW YOU GONNA BREAST FEED ME MOM? (WAH!) YOU AIN'T GOT NO {TITS!} (WAH!)
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed
Put a bulleproof vest on and tap myself in the head (BANG!)
I'm steamin mad (Arrrggghhh!) And by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah?)
Ask him if he bought a porno mag and seen my ad
* this is the UNEDITED album version; MTV's video is different
Chorus: repeat 2X
Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. {scratches} Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. {scratches} Slim Shady
Ahem.. excuse me!
Can I have the attention of the class for one second?
Hi kids! Do you like violence? (Yeah yeah yeah!)
Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids? (Uh-huh!)
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (Yeah yeah!)
Try 'cid and get fucked up worse that my life is? (Huh?)
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin to get my head straight
but I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate (Ummmm..)
And Dr. Dre said, "Slim Shady you a basehead!"
Uh-uhhh! "So why's your face red? Man you wasted!"
Well since age twelve, I've felt like I'm someone else
Cause I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt
Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off
And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross
I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass
faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast
C'mere slut! (Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog!)
I don't give a fuck, God sent me to piss the world off!
Chorus
My English teacher wanted to flunk me in junior high
Thanks a lot, next semester I'll be thirty-five
I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler
and stapled his nuts to a stack of paper (Owwwwwwww!)
Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up
Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup
Extraterrestrial, runnin over pedestrians
in a spaceship while they screamin: "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!"
Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mom does more dope than I do (Damn!)
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
Make a record about doin drugs and name it after her (Oh thank you!)
You know you blew up when the women rush your stands
and try to touch your hands like some screamin Usher fans (Aaahhhhhh!)
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph(Dude, can I get your autograph?)
So I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, ASSHOLE!'
Chorus
Stop the tape! This kid needs to be locked away! (Get him!)
Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, OPERATE!
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die (Fuck that!)
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive
(Huh yup!) Am I comin or goin? I can barely decide
I just drank a fifth of vodka -- dare me to drive? (Go ahead)
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years, and my palms are too hairy to hide
(Whoops!) Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk (hachhh-too)
I spit when I talk, I'll fuck anything that walks (C'mere)
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
HOW YOU GONNA BREAST FEED ME MOM? (WAH!)YOU AIN'T GOT NO TITS! (WAHHH!)
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed
Put a bulleproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (BANG!)
I'm steamin mad (Arrrggghhh!) And by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah?)
Tell him that I slit his throat, in this dream I had
Come on, hey hey, we goin' to the beach
grab a couple of toys and let dada strap you in the car seat.
Where's Mama?
She's takin' a little nap in the trunk,
Oh, that smell, dada must have run over a skunk.now I know what you're thinkin':
it's kind of late to go swimmin'
but you know your mama, she's one of those types of women-
who does crazy things, and if she don't get her way, she'll throw a fit,
don't play with daddy's toy knife, honey, let go of it
and don't be so upset, why you actin' bashful?
don't you wanna help dadda build a sand castle?
and mama said she wants to show how far she can float,
and don't worry about that little boo-boo on her throat
it's just a little scratch it don't hurt,
her was eatin' dinner while you was sleepin' and spilled ketchup on her shirt
mama's messy, isn't she, we'll let her wash off in the water
and me and you can play by ourselves, can't we?
just the two of us (sung) repeat 8-9 times
there's a place called heaven and a place called hell,
a place called prison and a place called jail,
and dada's probably on his way to all of 'em except one,
'cause mama's got a new husband in a stepson,
and you don't want a brother do ya? (Na)
maybe when you're old enough to understand a little better, I'll explain
it to ya. but for now we'll just say that mama was real, real bad
she was bein' mean to dad and made him real, real mad
but I still feel sad that I put her in time out,
sit back in your chair honey, quit tryin' to climb out
I told you it's okay, hey hey, wanna baba?
take a night-night, nana-boo, goo-goo ga-ga
her make coo-coo caca? dad'll change your ditie,
clean the baby up so her can take a nighty-nighty.
you're dad'll wake her up as soon as we get to the water,
'97 B onnie and Clyde, me and my daughter.
just the two of us (sung)
wake up sleepy head we're here,
before we play, we're gonna take mama for a little walk along the pier.
baby, don't cry honey, don't get the wrong idea,
mama's too sleepy to hear you screamin' in her ear,
that's why you can't get her to wake,
but don't worry, dada made a nice bed for mama at the bottom of the lake,
here, you wanna help dada tie a rope around this rock?
we'll tie it to her footsies then will roll her off the dock.
ready now, here we go, on the count of three,one, two, three...weeeeeeeeee
there goes mama splashin' in the water,
no more fightin' your dad, no more restrainin' order,
no more step dada, no more new brother,
blow her kisses bye-bye, tell mama you love her,
we'll go play in the sand, build a castle and junk,
but first, just help dad with two more things out the trunk.
